The wonderful contradictions of being a woman
August. International Women’s Day. The theme is everywhere. But what does it mean to be a woman? I think it means different things to different women, but for me, and I can only speak for myself, being a woman is one of the most contradictory things you can be.
It is a coexistence of contradictions.
To me, it is being strong and yet being weak. It is being fierce but gentle. It means being compassionate yet merciless. It means being wise and yet (sometimes) ridiculously illogical. It is being selfless and being selfish. It is being dauntless and being timid.
To me, being a woman is all these things, and so much more.
We are emotionally strong, yet physically weak(er). We are fierce in the face of danger, particularly when we are protecting someone else, but gentle and yielding and soft when comfort is sought. We have endless compassion that seems to spring from a natural well deep within us, yet cross us, or one of our own, and we will be ruthless and unforgiving in our seeking of justice. We have the wisdom of the ages entwined in our DNA but have moments of inexplicable irrationality (thanks hormones!). We are giving and selfless yet can be totally possessive and selfish about those things most precious to us. To me, being a woman means being at once tentative and apprehensive, but at the same time dauntless, brave, and heroic.
It is a continual rollercoaster of extremities. But it is marvellous.
Historically, being a woman meant we got the raw end of the deal in some arenas and women have been fighting this battle forever. But to me, feminism shouldn’t be about losing our femininity in the effort to “be equal”. We are not equal. We never will be. But we are equally valuable. We should be treated with equal respect and have equal rights, but we needn’t be “like men” to feel equal.
It is not a competition. It is a partnership on earth. We each add our own value to the world.
We should be proud of our own strengths and weaknesses, all our crazy contradictions. We should own them and be comfortable enough in our own skin to feel equally valued. We need to cherish our “woman-ness” and not see it as something less than. We need to reclaim our dignity, hold our heads high, and be strong, respected, amazing, feminine women, equally valued and equally valuing men.
I once read this, author unknown, but I love it. “Our generation is so busy trying to prove that women can do everything men can do, women are losing the unique qualities that set us apart. The God-given femininity and unique way our Creator designed us. Women weren’t created to do everything a man can do…. Women were created to do everything a man can’t do.”
So women, whatever your role or calling, whatever your preference, whatever your choices, remember that the lioness does not try to be the lion. The cow does not try to be the bull. The mama bear does not try to be the papa bear. All of them embrace their roles as the female. They are powerful, strong, and nurturing.
Meekness doesn’t equal weakness.
The world is constantly changing, and it needs more kind, compassionate, humble, tenacious, confident, fierce, bold, pure, and tender-hearted women. To lead, to follow, to set an example, to add a different element to business and thinking, to raise children who value these qualities in women, and be those women, and to just simply embrace and contribute to the world all her wonderful contradictions.
Welcome your contradictions. Don’t try be more like a man, or something different. Be your own wonderfully woman self. Harness those qualities and see them as strengths that add balance in the world. It’s the ying and yang that make up the whole, within us and without.
Embrace your wonderfully contradictory woman-ness. You are more than enough.
Happy Women’s Day.
